Friday, April 18, 2003

On this momentous day, Suite 280 received a shipment of special t-shirts. I’m wearing it now as I write to you, gentle reader, and let me tell you–it’s everything I thought it would be. Gone are the days when I would mail in a gazillion cereal box tops in irrepressible hope, only to find six to eight weeks later some shrinkwrapped refuse on my doorstep. What arrived in my mailbox today, you see, resembled what the Chapman brothers advertised to a “P.”

That “P” belongs to Pom Pom, whom some of you will recognize as Homestar Runner’s main man. This portly alien possesses sex appeal that boggles the mind–and all without a Green Card. Who would’ve thunk it? And the cotton feels special, as if the mysterious Homsar washed it in his sacred drool. And the sheer aura from the shirt screams, “I could defeat you in a knife fight.”

Indeed, it’s made from the best stuff.