Thursday, February 24, 2005

“You do software?” asked the banker.

“Nope,” I quickly replied, bracing myself for the inevitable exchange.

A raised eyebrow.

“Pop-ups, I do pop-ups,” I confessed to the eyebrow and the fellow attached to it.

“Pop-ups!” he laughed. “You seem like a nice guy. Man, this is like meeting a used car salesman for the first time.”

“Or the devil.”

“The devil,” he agreed.

“The devil.”

The truth is, gentle reader, we don’t really advertise much through pop-ups anymore, but saying so makes for an extremely convenient response. It also sends people into a convivial frenzy, which only adds interpersonal points to my scorecard. There was a time when I’d answer the critical question with “Internet advertising” or some other euphemistic phrase–”media investing for a digital age” is a fine one–but I’ve since thrown in the towel.

Frankly, I’m surprised it took so long for this conversation to surface, since I deposit client payments pretty much daily. Did the bankers and tellers think I was laundering money? Oh, if only. The past few months have actually been enjoyable at work, so I can’t complain too much. The need to surprise people, however, still pulses mightily. The next time someone inquires about the contours of my job, I’ll have to spice up things a bit. Professional mannequin. Speed bump. Door. Robot.