Tuesday, March 1, 2011
The clock reads 10:36 PM right now, which is a firm departure from when bloggery usually begins–11:45 PM to 11:47 PM–and proof positive that this website is under new management, at least for an evening. Instead of treating this as a twice weekly and occasionally arduous ritual, I’m calling it what it really is: a couple paragraphs produced at regular intervals to keep the ol’ frontal lobe limber. That’s it. I realize that thinking in these terms may lend the whole process a more factory-like quality, effectively overshadowing the joy of writing or some such, but I’m fine with that. If anything, this page is a living testament to how passion is seldom a prerequisite for prose.
I’m nearing the four-year mark in my townhouse, which is the longest I’ve ever stayed on a given plot of land, and I thought it’d be timely to reassess homeownership. Back in 2007, when the economy was merely teetering on the brink, rather than plummeting straight into it, having a place to call your own was exactly what folk wisdom prescribed, along with dumping most of your retirement portfolio into stocks. I remember inquiring into whether home values in the area would drop any further and being content with the data I gathered.
But then the proverbial fan store relocated right next to Shit Creek, both home value and portfolio declined by 30%, almost as if they were in cahoots, and the search for the new normal was on. Money aside, my foray into homeownership has been largely good. Biggest drawbacks? I count two things to keep in mind, the next time I’m in the market for property. First, never, ever buy near an apartment complex, what with the 3 AM noise, garbage, and early morning motorcycle idling. Second, make sure that neither your sidewalks nor driveway are concave, unless you like wondering how much water can possibly pool, every time there’s heavy rainfall.
Other than that, it’s been smooth sailing. All the homework and legwork was worth it. I’m glad I looked at so many places. Agonizing over building materials, paying attention to the buying process, and, most of all, mapping out the number of left turns needed to enter and exit the development–all of it was time well spent. A lot of credit goes to the Operator, too, for architecting an experience free from the horrors typically reserved for first-time homeowners. My sister closed on a condo recently, and it was a hell of a road getting there. Her agent botched the endgame, then enlisted his mom to help, who then attempted to cram my sister into a home equity loan. Now, I’m no financial advisor, but I’m pretty sure you need a house to take out such a loan, never mind equity in said house. Or, to put this into terms that would’ve been understandable to these carnies, you can’t borrow against a Ferris wheel that doesn’t exist.