Thursday, June 10, 2010
Secondhand Rants will return on Tuesday, June 15.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Sure, many of my television mainstays may have broadcasted their shocking season finales already, heralding a long summer drought of good programming, but I’m resourceful. You know me. The ability to fire up Hulu and watch, watch, watch is always a click away, and clicking just so happens to be my specialty. Pawn Stars is the most recent addition to my stable of backup shows and it’s hypnotic, not only for its content but also for its general insights into reality TV.
On the face of it, the series offers a candid look at the day-to-day dealings of a family-owned pawn shop. The family in question is interesting–shrewd, oddly mole-like, a strange intersection between carney folk and retail professionals. The unwitting customers are equally fascinating and commodify people watching, in a way, with a parade of soft negotiators peddling their occasionally wretched tales, all of them hopeful that their pile of shit, unlike all those other piles, will garner untold riches.
After a few episodes, though, the characters become one-note, cardboard caricatures of themselves. Take the Old Man, for instance. He’s a fount of grumpy, folksy retorts. But beyond that, the footage doesn’t give much more. I would love to see a sequence of him mulling over his legacy, wracked by concern over its sustainability. Like, I wonder if he’s heard about the new sheriff in town who’s far more efficient at relocating people’s garbage.
Perhaps this is what makes reality television tick. It ain’t Mad Men, nor does it have to be, and maybe life that isn’t expressed in a screenplay just isn’t as interesting, forcing the show to keep its characters flat and simple to tease out real-life drama more easily. The only other unscripted show I’ve seen recently is Food Revolution, and there too the villains were thoroughly villainous, until they swung completely the other way and became Jamie Oliver’s best friends. You wonder if Idol would’ve been as engaging if Simon suddenly turned friendly during his tenure, or if Real World, wherever it may be now, should ever forgo fulfilling its skank quota. These shows get the job done, as far as escapism goes, and with all the historical tidbits from Pawn Stars and my continued intake of Mad Men, I’m able to escape to a simpler era, one 20-minute increment at a time.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Two. Only two video games completed over the course of more than five days, and frankly such progress is reprehensible. When last we spoke, we started building a syllabus of electronic diversions, and by close of Memorial Day I had expected to conquer five, possibly four, or at the very least three titles. Didn’t happen. Clearly my throughput’s been compromised, and my initial theories placed the blame on reflexes dulled by age, lack of focus, or general sloth.
Whatever the causes, my poor showing may actually have been a boon in disguise. You’ve probably read news coverage at some point or another on how gaming correlates with increased aggression and violence. Now, while I’m not gripped by ill will toward living creatures whenever I turn off the console, I will tell you this: after an Xbox binge, the mere sight of a flammable symbol, gas tank, or an oil drum stirs within me a compulsion to shoot the container in question. It’s the strangest thing. I mean, it’s not like I even own a gun, but that fiendish gaming trope–which asks that all red barrels and other combustible objects be shot so they can prodigiously explode in a glorious plume of fire–occasionally will give me pause as I drive by, say, the propane tanks at the supermarket.
Obviously it’s time to take a break from video games. There are far more pressing matters of the mind, however, with the most significant being that the mental haze is back. It’s disappointing, really. You’ll have a thought, then reach out to seize it, only to discover a fuzzy outline of an idea. More sleep is certainly important. But beyond that, I’m wondering if there’s a way to formulate a kind of boot camp for the brain. There must be.