Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Secondhand Rants will return on Thursday, October 31.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

“Congratulations,” said Cheshire, when I explained to her my new philosophy on productivity from Tuesday’s screed. “You’ve turned into a single mom.” It wasn’t precisely what I was expecting, but then again, you never know where you’ll find life’s little flashes of wisdom, right? I’m sorry! I’m sorry. I was trying to be inspirational just now, until a deep nausea overtook me. This nausea lead to an increase in bile, fortunately, which effectively restored my equilibrium.

I only have two windows open tonight–this one and eBay. The Professor was explaining to me, a few weeks ago, about how our possessions are proxies for stages of our lives. It seems like a no-brainer, especially as the distance between stages widens. I wouldn’t even dream of playing with the Legos my six-year-old self valued, for instance. There’s just no appeal there, you know? But what’s particularly striking to me is how this same nonchalance applies to things I purchased in my mid-twenties, when I was a fully cognizant adult. Back then, I dug DVDs and procured hundreds of them. Now, I’m selling ’em by the pound without a second look.

I’ve got a system down. Group my wares in themed lots of 50 to 100. Take photos. Knock out some copy. List for seven days, pack as soon as a lot gets a single bid, and then it’s off to the UPS Store, once payment clears. It’s unbelievably freeing, whenever I unload my car. Bit by bit, listing by listing, I feel like I’m punching through strata from another life. And when I finally arrive at where I want to be, the person I want to be? That’s when we’ll turn this site around and start ladling on some real Chicken Soup for the Soul shit.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

I have four windows open at this very moment. These aren’t real windows, mind you. That would be too easy, if my sole aim were to collect as much fresh air as possible tonight. No, these are virtual windows. One is for WordPress–and for us, really. Another is for work, where the tide of e-mail seldom relents. The third window gazes upon eBay, where four of my five listings have watchers, but have yet to garner any bids. The final window contains a video tour highlighting the most important parts of Texas apartment rental agreements. It’s not playing in an active tab, though, so it’s less video and more super-boring podcast.

In a different era, such a setup wouldn’t have been possible. There would’ve been a journal. A day job. A garage sale. A conversation between prospective tenant and landlord. Not so long ago, you would’ve paid a heavy price for this kind of connectivity–literally, as you wielded your five-pound satellite phone for 20 minutes of talk time. There was no hiding one of those things. It was a public avowal, a scarlet letter. We’ve since traded that heft for small, smooth, rounded corners, and as light as our devices have gotten, as hidden as they’ve become, I can’t help wonder if we lost something in the trade. Some of our humanity, perhaps.

First-world problems, right? Very likely so, but they need to be navigated nonetheless. At first, I thought the tried-and-true method of focusing on one thing at a time would be the answer. Your very own pointillist painting, I said. I’m not so sure anymore, because the dots themselves don’t materialize conveniently, one at a time. They rain down in quantity, and often they all demand your attention equally. My new answer? Fuck prioritization and do everything you can, at all times, until you have to go to bed.