How do I put this? I’m in between computers. You may have suspected, given the recent volume of typos, that I’ve purposefully manufactured them, like a clutch of rotten Easter eggs for you to discover. The truth is I’ve been using Notepad to produce our weekly posts, which means I must rely on reading and rereading, rather than squiggly red underlines, to identify misspellings. I won’t bore you with how I procured a slightly less antiquated desktop to replace my truly ancient one, but I will tell you this: in place of a 3.5″ floppy drive, my new setup will sport an SD card slot.
This will be a boon to my cottage industry–eBaying–because SD cards, I’m told, are how digital cameras talk with other consumer electronics. Gone are the days when you had to drop off a roll of film at CVS. Now, it’s simply a matter of pointing, shooting, and then shoving the picture card into the picture hole. I never realized how time-consuming photography could be, though, with finding the right lighting and framing and everything else. It’s, like, I’m not trying to be Ken Burns here! I just want to offload some quality merchandise online.
Photos aside, I’ve got the copy down pat. There are certain aspects to hone–I need to milk the illusion of free shipping, for instance–but the core conceit is there. The auction persona I’ve adopted is the “gee whiz, I have no idea how valuable my wares are, so go ahead and take advantage of me” angle, and it’s proven its worth, drawing bidders like moths to an auction portal for moths. Round two begins this weekend, on the eve of Independence Day, and I shall celebrate my liberty, freed from clutter, my customers freed from cash.
It’s been a while since I’ve talked about skill acquisition, which was my de facto framework a few years ago, and a large reason is a shift of self. Instead of placing a premium on learning how to do stuff, I’ve been valuing the what and the who–the experience, and the people, are what matter now. That said, there’s been one skill I’ve been mulling over recently, and proficiency, or even mastery, would likely have far-reaching benefits. And that’s how to tell a story.
What really got me thinking about this skill was a business meeting last week. In case you’re wondering whether this is the beginning of a tale of redemption, where the meeting went horribly awry and compelled me to do some deep soul-searching, it’s not. It was an important two-hour presentation, and we crushed it. But even as I was speaking, I had this nagging feeling that I should be doing something differently. The complexity of my demo came across well enough, as intended, but even though we were looking at a spreadsheet, could it transcend its nature and be absolutely riveting? I think it’s possible.
I get the same nagging feeling, sometimes, when I’m conversing about my past. Something about the shape of the story will just seem off. Perhaps it’ll be too long, or too short, or the order could be better arranged. It’s curious, when you think about how we all respond to the narrative tradition, and yet the telling can be so difficult. Still, if stories can get me to go to church, then there’s a power to them. The steps I’ve taken to crack this nut are simple. I’ve started being more aware about how my favorite movies, shows, and games are spun. I’ve also gone meta, with talk about talk. Maybe one day, after I figure all this out, I’ll sit you down, collect my thoughts, and then recall an era when I didn’t know how to tell a story, once upon a time.
Well, that didn’t last long. You may recall how ecstatic I was about the consumer-unfriendly features of the Xbox One, which offered me sound and sustainable reasons to skip the next generation of gaming. I thought for sure Sony would follow Microsoft’s lead, but I was totally wrong. They’re kicking it old-school for the PS4, with hardware that honors the traditional notions of ownership, and now my erstwhile plan has been completely derailed.
There’s a part of me that’s disappointed, of course, and if that isn’t a stark manifestation of a first-world problem, I don’t know what is. Originally, I had pictured untold amounts of time and money liberated from the clutches of gaming. Some of this still holds true, I suppose, only at about half of what I imagined. I thought I would be completely free, and now, it’s more like I’m on probation. By and large, though, I’m glad to be able to gain access to the next generation and all the eye candy it has on offer.
I even went so far as to pre-order the stupid thing, a move that firmly plants me in the ninth circle of nerd. Amazon just makes it so effortless, you know? Two-day delivery, no tax, no charging until the item actually ships, no fighting the crowds. All that’s left is to determine how to fund this man-toy, and the answer is simple: eBay. I’ve finally healed from the first batch of sales, and now it’s time for round two, armed with an antiquated digital camera as I hawk the refuse of old for coin and cause.