Monday, October 2, 2006

Work has consumed me, rent our delicate schedule into shreds plentiful and silent, but like the 350-pounder at Sizzler I’m unrepentant. Every minute, every tock, every grain through the middle–worth it. This isn’t to say every second has been pleasant, of course, and indeed there have been moments when the simultaneous existence of sunshine and lollipops has been questioned, doubted even. It’s just the time spent has been worthwhile.

There’s a lot to discuss: the curious intersection between work and religion. The road culture. A serious deficit in delicious burritos. And, of course, the search for a place where one of the weekend hotspots isn’t Walmart. But for now, Youtube needs to be addressed.

The online service has become a kind of provisional television, and it will continue in this capacity until I purchase cable and a TV. Grey’s Anatomy, for instance, is an urgent topic every Thursday, and Youtube is a willing accomplice with its steady stream of illicitly procured episodes from the running season.

The crux of tonight’s talk, in case you’re taking notes, is what the hell compels people to set video montages of Ellen Pompeo and cast against “Seasons of Love.” The Internet is the freest of free marketplaces, don’t get me wrong, but when I visit Youtube I expect the user experience to turn it into Metube real quick-like. Yeah, I’m glad you were able to publish your first latchkey masterwork, a subtle weave of Season 2 highlights with Snow Patrol blaring in the background, and on an unrelated note get me a goddamn search filter.

These are the same people, I imagine, who ardently produce fanfiction, those apocryphal texts usually resulting in Captain Kirk making out with Lord Vader on the holodeck. You understand my frustration, I’m sure. In the real world, if you were looking for Star Wars bootlegs and the guy popped the trunk, you wouldn’t find a rabid fan dressed like Chewbacca jumping out of it. That would be indecent.