Thursday, January 14, 2010
Six hours of sleep, one full day at work, two cocktails, and half a steak later, here I am, in the early hours of the morning, with a singular purpose: to regale you with vital information, a full four paragraphs of it, published electronically using powerful modern technologies. I’ve got cars on the brain, specifically my car, which shit the bed again on Monday in a stunning encore performance. I’m thinking we should make this a regular monthly event, and if the wheels fail to fall off in February, there may be disappointment. Tears, even.
Third time’s a charm, apparently, because I’m ponying up for the real repair job this time, rather than the band-aid fix I’ve purchased during prior episodes. It’s going to cost substantially more, but it’s not the expense I’m considering right now. There’s a far deeper matter at play here, I believe, and it’s the question of loyalty and the benefits thereof. Let’s be honest here. It’s an inanimate object–doubly so, I suppose, when it just sits there in a miserable pile in a parking lot–and to pledge fealty to an automobile is ludicrous.
But because it’s been with me since Chicago, simply by virtue of attendance, it’s been getting pass after free pass. It really doesn’t make sense, especially when the goddamn loaner I’ve been driving, ostensibly a vehicle regularly maintained by the dealership, is prone to locking and unlocking its doors without provocation. Current high score is five times. Is it haunted, perhaps by the bewildered soul of a previous Saab owner? Or is it simply foreshadowing issues to come for my own car?
Staying the course would be a gross example of gambler’s fallacy, and yet this is precisely the route I’ve chosen, unclear of any real benefit. I mean, it’s not like the car will suddenly become aware that I’ve resisted pawning it off at the nearest Carmax, then proceed to drive better. The best it can do is not break! And yet I’m still here. At the table. A 1 on a scale that spans from golden retriever to mercenary. Maybe it’s time to go Hessian.