Thursday, January 6, 2011

Were this any other Thursday evening, I’d find myself firing up WordPress at about a quarter to midnight, then staring blankly at the screen for a good long while. Tonight is different, though, with the keyboard clacking well ahead of schedule. Why? It’s simple, really. I’ve got to roll into the office at 8 AM sharp tomorrow–a certifiably grown-up, if ungodly hour–and there are far, far better reasons than a blog to show up bleary-eyed and incoherent. Still, 8 AM. 8! For me, the “A” in AM stands for “anti.” I mean, I don’t even know what a meridiem is, but I can tell you I hate it.

I’ve been embarking on a journey recently to rid myself of certain material possessions. It’s something I’ve been mulling over for a while now, and when the right circumstances arose, indeed compelled me to divest myself of some worldly goods, I jumped at the chance. Stuff is a curious quantity. Its value plummets, in most cases, the moment it falls under your ownership, and yet it exerts a strange pull on you to keep it, whatever “it” may be.

In my case, it’s a metric shitload of DVDs. Am I ever going to watch them again? Unlikely. Or consider the pile of classic Nintendo games. The old gray box, quaint as it is, should probably stay in the realm of nostalgia. I don’t imagine Duck Hunt is as riveting as it used to be. There’s also a truckload of PC software that’s long overdue for a substantial culling. You remember King’s Quest? Sure, I had pictured how I’d fashion some vintage hardware into a DOS-based computer one lazy Sunday afternoon, but let’s be honest here. Not gonna happen.

That’s the heart of the matter. Stuff insinuates itself into your house and mind, fabricating reason after reason for why it should stay. Those dusty old books? Yeah, they’re never going to be yellowed heirlooms, lovingly handed down for generations to come. The bitter truth of the matter is that when you’re dead and gone, your stuff ain’t coming with you. Sorry, Egyptian mummies of old. I dare say your servants fucked up when they shoveled all that junk into your pyramids.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not hellbent on trading material riches for sackcloth and sandals. I still enjoy my Xbox. Blu-ray movies in 1080p are mesmerizing. But at some point, a sizable cut of my belongings turned into a burden, and now it’s time to optimize my life. I’ve already converted six or so games into cash, sold dozens of books, and it’s a rush. Freeing. Also, money is fantastic. It’s one of my favorite things. Trade paper and ancient plastic for dollars, space, and freedom? Sounds like a favorable exchange rate, for once.