Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Six years ago, faced with the heady prospect of being a first-time homebuyer, I made a simple, unreasonable request to the Operator: I wanted to wake up one morning in my new townhouse. Sure enough, improbably enough, she made it happen, deftly plowing through all the stressful little details normally associated with the process. I thought about the delicious symmetry today when I was knee-deep in eBay, surrounded by caches of packing material and empty boxes stacked in precarious towers, because I made a simple, unreasonable request, right then and there: I wanted to wake up in Texas.

This time, however, only I can make good on the request. You know how sometimes you reach a milestone on a project and you think to yourself, “Man, I wish I were at this point three weeks ago”? That’s precisely where I am. I’ve sold a few hundred DVDs to date, clearing a sweet two grand in cheddar just this week alone, but the finish line is nowhere in sight. During darker, defeatist moments like these, I find it helpful to take a deep breath–and then promptly recall, mid-inhalation, all the other non-eBay shit that needs to be done.

Indeed, while this garbage-to-gold alchemy must continue at full speed, there are other to-dos: renter’s insurance, for instance, and exercising stock options from my last gig. Got to close my bank accounts here, too, but not before setting up direct deposit. Mail forwarding! Can’t forget that. Get some keys made for the new tenants–but I’ll punt that a few weeks. Got to remember to pick up glasses at some point. Switch to paperless for utilities, too. And, oh! There’s the day job. That one’s pretty important. I’m thinking back to a time when I could clock in serious Xbox time, sometimes for back-to-back days, and it’s a distant memory. The scary part? I don’t really miss it.