Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Halfway through comparison-shopping for a slick, reliable off-brand hosting service, I came to my senses and made a beeline for GoDaddy. Initially there was a pang of guilt for succumbing to a major company, the same kind of reservation often leveled at Microsoft, McDonald’s, or Starbucks. Here’s the question, though: Do I really want to sign on with another Site5 or Aplus, small e-businesses that begin promisingly and then, a year later, desperately need to retool their rev flow because, y’know, beanbag chair clearance at IKEA?

I don’t want to root for the small, scrappy band of rebels anymore. I vote for the oppressive empire. Give me a McHost, venti, with all the fixings, and give it to me quickly. Site5 unfurled the pomp and circumstance for their customer support. The sad reality was their product certainly needed it, and if your crown jewel gives out during those moments of need, well, I imagine tangoing after having your legs cut off would be a far more attainable goal.

If I want an iced coffee, Starbucks will do just fine. A burger? What I expect at McDonald’s is what I’ll get, without the fuss. There’s no need for a song and a dance about the fantastic customer service poured into every goddamn fry. Hosting, I think, shouldn’t be different. GoDaddy is big, certainly, yet this doesn’t mean their bandwidth is carried on the backs of disenfranchised, underage eunuchs who know only the cold lash of disapproval. It’s just bandwidth, cheap to boot, and we’re live right now.