Tuesday, January 25, 2011

After carefully considering all the venues in which I could offload my quality merchandise, I’ve settled on eBay, though not without some serious reservations. For a brief stretch, Craigslist was in pole position, until I realized the selling experience would essentially mirror eBay, except you risk being mugged or, even worse, having to meet your customers in person. I did my due diligence. Amazon, Half, GameGavel–all had their pros and cons, but none could hold a candle to the scale or familiarity of eBay. My buying experiences in the marketplace have been largely fine. But far on the other side of the table, the story reads a little differently for sellers.

eBay’s general policy for merchants is to grease up. Back in the day, you could request your buyers pay via traditional means, such as check or money order. These offline avenues have since been barricaded in favor of Paypal. Oh, I’ve read the horror stories, probably all of them, and I’ve concluded that linking to your bank account effectively grants Paypal carte blanche to shake you down at the buyer’s whim. Say Joe Bidder wins your item, receives it, and then decides he should’ve paid rent first. Once he files that dispute, his refund’s likely to be extracted from your checking account before you can get a word in edgewise.

Chances are that once I sell enough items, probability will overtake me and I will encounter le douche. That’s not a French restaurant, by the way. Now, until that day arrives, the plan is to screen my bidders carefully and–this is key–set up a separate checking account to minimize the damage, in case things ever go sideways. That’s precisely what I did during lunchtime today. I took the elevator down to the lobby, stepped into my bank, and, after they plied me with refreshments and remembered not to call me “Mr. Wu,” I held forth on my plight in vivid detail.

For some reason, Charon comes to mind whenever I think about Paypal. I don’t think it’s a stretch, either, because Paypal really is the sole way to cross into eBay, only instead of the ferryman of lore, you’re dealing with his toolbag of a cousin. Like, you’ll hand the dude a coin, and then find three more taken from your wallet because, well, port authority said.